Chapter 1 | New Horizons
Monday, October 13th, 1890
Journal,
Just before sunset, I saw the strangest lights in the sky. Streams of yellow, red, and orange stretched across the full horizon without beginning or end. Mother said it must have been one of them space rocks the scientists from the university talk about. She says it is an omen—a good one, I hope. I like to think it is a sign that love is on the horizon for me; how I long to meet the one meant for me. I will be thirteen soon. November 13th—less than a month away. Mother says I will be able to be with child soon. My womanhood is approaching. I am a bit scared about becoming a woman. I am eager to feel the touch of a man in wedlock but still afraid to walk away from my mother and father’s comfort. They say I should be readying myself for a man. Father wishes for me to marry one who can live on the farm and help with chores. Or he says: to marry into wealth so that I can elevate our bloodline into a less labor-intensive life. But I love the farm; I couldn’t imagine living any other way.
I spent the afternoon in the meadow of our plot’s west side, reading and enjoying the breeze. A doe and her fawns sauntered past me as I rested in the grass. The mother was so close I could have touched her, but I didn’t want to frighten her away. They looked at such peace while grazing. Then the light shot clear across the sky in the blink of an eye, and they scurried off. The strange thing appeared to land far off into the distance, crashing into something. One could hear the impact from far away. I hope to seek it out tomorrow—if possible. I could not make an accurate measure of how far it is from home. I will inspect tomorrow after chores.
Wednesday, October 15th, 1890
Journal,
The weather grows colder each day, with winter on its way. I need to knit some warmer clothes before I make my way to inspect the object and where it landed. Yesterday the weather did not permit for travels. Mother and I spent the better half of the day working cream into fat for butter molds. Father will be pleased. I don’t think he loves anything on this green earth more than buttered bread with mother’s wild blueberry jam. Father says: the blueberry harvest was the largest he’s seen since he was my age. Said he’d be turning purple by spring with all of Mother’s jam. I hope she jarred some for pie. I prefer pie to jam.
Thursday, October 16th, 1890
Journal,
I tried to make my way to the object but was unable to find anything. It must have landed somewhere far-far out in the distance. I was so hoping to see something from another world. Pastor Dave says it was likely an angel coming to check in on us, making sure we are treating our friends, family, and neighbors better than we treat ourselves. He is a good man, always worrying about everyone in town and how they are doing. I wonder if he would be a good fit for me. Can he even lay with a woman? I am unsure of the rules of the church. I would hate to learn that he must remain celibate to leave this place without passing on his good-natured ways. I should bring him some of mother’s jam. If he likes it as much as father – maybe that would be the sign I am looking for.
Tuesday, October 28th, 1890
Journal,
A strange man has been riding his horse on the outskirts of our lands the past week. He only seems to ride as the sun goes down. Father says he must be the new neighbor that bought up land on the other side of the creek. He looks so mysterious out there riding all alone. I’d like to meet him and learn about where he comes from and whether he has a wife or children. His horse looks beautiful. She is dark brown with a long wisp of hair hanging over her head. I think I will take Betsy out next time I see him. Mother says to invite him for supper if he is willing. I believe mother wants me wedded more than I – well, I don’t know if that is entirely true. Marriage is all I think about. She does want grandchildren, though. Poor mother couldn’t bear any more children after me. The doctor said she got torn up inside and that I am lucky to even be here today. I cannot wait to give her grandchildren and grow our family.
Saturday, November 1st, 1890
Journal,
Father has given me the day off of chores, and the weather is quite forgiving. I hope to ride out and meet the new neighbor later. I missed him the past few nights. He has been riding along the creek that divides our land each evening but not for the past few. I hope to see him tonight. Maybe he had been reluctant to venture out due to the cold. Tonight, the temperature will drop again, but the day will stay warm until sunset. Father says it is a sign of a harsh winter when the oncoming days are warmer than the passing days. He likes to say, “For every summer day amid fall, an extra week of winter is paid by spring.” Then mother tells him to hush and says, “Unexpected days of warmth is nature’s way of reminding us how delicate we are, and to prepare for what’s to come.” They sometimes bicker in silly ways. It can be adorable. They are still in love. I hope to find the same. Father says: I just need to follow my heart—and I will, but to be careful not to confuse the heart’s desire with the loins desire.
I saddled Betsy, and we walked down to the creek and waited until sunset. Finally, he and his animal came galloping through his meadows up to the stream. He came right up and across from me, where his horse can drink from an easily accessible vein of water. He stared at me for a moment. At least, I think he did. It was just getting dark, and the sun was setting behind him so that I couldn’t see much more than his body’s shape. I wanted to say something, but nothing came out. I suppose I am a bit shy or nervous around this man. After his horse finished drinking, he turned around and went back off into the fields. I will try to reencounter him tomorrow. I wish to see his face.
Wednesday, November 5th, 1890
Journal,
Each night I have gone out to the creek in search of the unknown man. Father has also walked up to his ranch to try and make his acquaintance but was unsuccessful. I haven’t seen him since he came up to the creek – until early this morning. Father wants me to get up extra early to make sure the ground isn’t starting to frost. We have some crops that need to be pulled before the frost begins, but he wants them to stay connected to the plant as long as possible. When I was out checking the grounds, I saw the man standing in the middle of the east field. He was just standing there. It’s a good thing father wasn’t awake yet, for he may have gone after him with his rifle. I wonder what he was doing out there on our land. It was bizarre. He didn’t even move when he saw me. He just stood there watching me and then turned around and looked off into the distance. I didn’t know what to do, so I went back inside until the sun came up. Do you think he wanted me to come to him? I had the strangest sensation that he wanted me to go to him. It was almost as if I could hear his thoughts telling me to come to him. He again stood with the sun to his back. The light in my eyes made it so I couldn’t get a clear look at him.
Friday, November 7th, 1890
Journal,
This afternoon, we are going into Fort Pierre city. Father is to speak with the townspeople about what is to come of our land now that South Dakota has been admitted to the united states’ union. He fears the government is to try and steal our plot from us. It is a lengthy trip. It is also the first time father is allowing me to leave the land – outside of some extended riding. I expect he wishes for me to meet some friends of his. He has a brother that lives there, and we are to take up residence with him when we arrive—staying for the weekend. Mother is also coming.
Should I tell them about the man standing on our land? I don’t think they would leave if I did. I don’t think he means harm. I don’t think he even knew he was on our land. It is difficult to know where one’s land starts and the other ends without a map. Besides, I think he was there for me. He must have been. It is the second time he has approached me. But why doesn’t he come further than to just stand there? I suppose he is thinking the same of me: (“Why doesn’t she come to me instead of just stand there?”) Mother tells me that men are often thinking the same thing we are, but it is perceived as the opposite. She said to me: if I feel a certain way about a man and he is near me, he feels the same way regardless of what message I think he is trying to send. She then says, “I should take charge because men may be strong on the outside, but they are weak on the inside, just the opposite of women. We live in a physical and non-physical world where men have outer strength and women have inner strength. That is why God gave the female spirit the duty of bearing children—a man’s spirit could never handle the physically demanding responsibility.”
Continued- We are now at father’s brother’s house. Uncle Tommy is what father calls him. It is the first time I have met him since I was too young to remember, says father. His home is interesting; it is not on farm as ours is. He has two daughters, Cynthia and Kathryn, and a son, Johnny. Johnny is cute. He is my age or a year older, maybe. Cynthia and Kathryn are twins and are older than Johnny. They do not look alike but were born the same day and from the same womb. Uncle Tommy says I am the spitting image of my mother when she was only a few years older than I. Mother and father wedded when she was fifteen. I’m not sure how old Father was – just that he is older than Mother. Uncle Tommy is younger than father but was married before him. I don’t know his wife; they do not speak of her much, and I don’t wish to upset uncle Tommy by asking about her. Something must have happened to her. It is just the four of them living together.
The town is fascinating. The people have roads made of stones weaving through it and around their homes. It hurts Betsy’s feet, so I walk her off on the grass, but the townspeople do not like this. I don’t think I like the city. All the people so close together causes too much friction between them. Space is healthy, mother says.
Monday, November 10th, 1890
Journal,
We spent the whole weekend with Uncle Tommy and his kids and are now preparing to head back home. I don’t know where to call home now. I never thought to have to label where we live. Father says he has confirmed that our land will stay our land, and he also found out the name of our mysterious neighbor. I think father was worried that the neighbor is trying to take on our land, but after talking to the townspeople, he learned that he isn’t. Father says his name is Alexandru and he is not from the Americas. Maybe this is why he did not speak to me. He must not know the language. When we get home, I am going to find him and talk to him.
Tuesday, November 11th, 1890
Journal,
Father is beside himself. After our long travels back from Fort Pierre, we all went straight to bed. When we woke, a few of the cattle were not in the stalls waiting to be milked. They never wander off when it is time to be milked unless we don’t show up. One time daddy and mother were sick, and I was too young to milk the cattle, so they all went out into the fields to graze, and their milk just leaked right out the teat onto the soil. We had a good crop the following year when we planted at that graze. Since then, father pours any milk we have leftover on the seasons grazed sites.
Continued- Father is now really beside himself. I am too. We found two of the cows out in the field, and they were lifeless—dead. Father tied them up and dragged them back to the barn to see if their meat can be salvaged. When he opened them up, he didn’t find any blood. He hasn’t the faintest clue as to what happened to them. Except, he thinks it was the legendary Maskelmela beast the Natives warned the settlers about when they took the land from them. They told them: Those who choose to live on this land choose to be cursed. Mother says: It’s just misunderstood superstition. But now, she seems unsure after seeing the cows. She told me the story—she said, “The tail tells of a visitor who comes from the sky, riding a snake made of fire. The creature then takes up residence in the woods and absorbs the life and flowing blood of whatever encounters it.” The lights in the sky, and the cows, seem a bit too coincidental, says father. I don’t know – maybe it is an animal that attacked them, and the blood just dried up. Father did say there were marks on the cows—some type of teeth or claw marks. Puncture wounds – deep puncture wounds he said they were. None like he has ever seen; six of them all lined up down the side of the neck in a row. I don’t know.
Wednesday, November 12th, 1890
Journal,
Something strange is going on as of late. The missing blood from those animals seems to have found its way into my bed. Mother says I am now a woman, and I will bleed each lunar cycle until I lay with man. Is this some sort of punishment or curse? I don’t think it was coincidental that the cows lost their blood, and I come to age the next day. And tomorrow is my birthday; what a gift. It will just be me, father, and mother tomorrow. Father went off to try and speak with Alexandru and see if he had noticed anything strange while we were gone. Alexandru and Clara. Clara and Alexandru. Mr. and Mrs. … I wonder what his last name is.
My stomach hurts today. I think it is because of the cycle. Mother gave me the day off of chores. I have been laying on my bed without sheets. It isn’t as comfortable – kind of itchy. Something keeps poking me too. I think it is the quill of a feather. I don’t know how we can clean this. The blood has soaked clean through to the floor. I have been scooching myself off to the side, so I am not sitting on it. Mother says it will dry, and we can cover it up with heavy blankets in a day or two, and in the summer, we can make a new one with the chicks down. I wonder if father will let me go for a ride today. I’d like to go out past the creek again and look for the object—see if there is any evidence of the Maskelmela.
Thursday, November 13th, 1890
Journal,
It is my birthday today. It was nice. Mother made me a pie from some blueberries she jarred. She had them hidden away so it would be a surprise for me. It was—I was excited, and it tasted so good. I needed something tasty after yesterday. Father never found out anything about the cows. Alexandru is still yet to be seen outside of my encounters. I don’t even know for sure if who I saw is Alexandru. He could have been anybody for all I know, but I feel like it must be the neighbor. Who else would be out there walking and riding freely without care? I think I’d like to set up camp out there and wait for him to arrive. Maybe he will then come to me and take me on the grassy earth, relieving me of this bloody burden.
Thursday, November 20th, 1890
Journal,
My dreams have become ever so real the past nights. I dreamt that Alexandru has come into my bedroom and wakes me without words. It’s as if he can speak directly to my thoughts. The first night he stood at my bed’s foot and watched me sleep. I didn’t wake up, but I knew he was there watching. The second night he sat on the bed and held my hand as I looked into his eyes. I remember looking at his face, into his eyes, but I don’t recall what he looks like. The third night he didn’t come to my dreams; instead, I had a vision of the object that flew through the sky and where it may have made contact. I think my subconscious is telling me something about what I saw, but I cannot quite make it out. He came back on the fourth night and again sat on my bed, holding my hand. He kissed the back of my hand before he left, going out the window. I must have been sleepwalking; when I woke the following morning, the window was open, and I was freezing. I must have slept walk up to it, and opened it while dreaming about Alexandru. I have not seen him since that night. I did dream again about the object in the sky. Last night, I dreamt it stopped in the middle of its flight, standing frozen in the sky, leaving half the horizon filled with the trail of fiery colors. It looked shiny – like mother’s silver. It was round but not circular—looked like mother’s silver gravy boat but with no handle or foot.
The day looks to be another unexpected warm day. Mother says there are odd movements in the planetary bodies this year. I read that what I saw is called a meteorite. Uncle Tommy had some old schoolbooks his daughters no longer needed that he let me have for an early birthday present. I don’t think mother and father know much about heavenly objects. The book says that rocks from distant worlds come into our atmosphere, and the heat becomes so intense they ignite into a fiery trail of blazing flames. This is what I must have seen.
Continued- I was taking a nap today on the new sheets mother encased my mattress in. The bed is more comfortable than ever now. I fell right asleep on it when I laid down after lunch. Alexandru returned to me. This time, I felt his presence, and when I opened my eyes, he was floating above me parallel to my body. I couldn’t see his face. I was being blinded by some light shining behind his head. But this time, I could see his eyes. They looked shiny and metallic, the same as the object in the sky but at the same time liquid. The material moved over his eyes, sending tiny ripples of liquid metal outward like dropping a cracker into a bowl of thick soup.